- I have already completed 3 chapters from my thesis, where I would like you to review and make changes as needed based on my supervisor’s feedback.
- I want you to continue writing the remaining chapters and include the discussion and conclusion along with the survey outcomes in charts and graphs as needed.
- I want the paper to be written in a very high quality, academic language
- I already have references, but please feel free to amend or add more as needed.
Supervisor’s feedback
- The methodology chapter is poorly referenced; all ideas must be adequately backed by evidence and justification of why you have chosen to use them.
- The review often reads as a description or summary of individual sources rather than a critical synthesis of the literature.
- Informal phrasing like “so many people use the internet,” “marketer needs to be thoughtful,” and “help in real life” reduces academic rigour. Use formal, precise, and objective language.
- Points about social media benefits, cultural fit, misinformation, and trust are repeated in multiple sections.
- The structure occasionally jumps between ideas—e.g., from influencers to misinformation to AI—without smooth transitions.
Examples,
“These theories can teach us something…” → Replace with “These frameworks provide analytical tools for understanding…”
“When a health matter does not appear urgent…” → Consider “When perceived susceptibility or severity is low…”
- While each theory is discussed, there is minimal critical comparison, cross-referencing, or discussion of complementarities and limitations.
Discuss how HBM focuses on individual risk, SCT adds the social/observational layer, and DOI frames adoption as a networked process.
Reflect on how combining them provides a richer analysis but may still lack cultural nuance unless adapted. Overall, aim to improve the academic writing style of the report and be more critical in writing. Contrast ideas and link sentences properly to create a good flow of the work.